Borris:
A Gothic Tale
by
Chad McClendon
Genre:
YA Horror, Satire
It
was supposed to be a normal night at work for Jenna Byam, but when a
Vampire Raccoon puts the grocery store where she works on lock-down,
everything changes. She must find solace in the arms of a young stock
boy hero, Brody, who is the only hope of ridding the world of this
terror. But the raccoon's manservant, Vaan Strudel, has no intentions
of making things easy for them. There's a cleanup in every aisle once
Borris gets their juices flowing.
**
Only 99 cents!!**
Excerpt 1: “Vaan Strudel! Master says, Vaan Strudel! Get me a bride! A young bride! A fine catch! Miss Yenna, Vaan Strudel only wants to help the Master! You must marry him!” He swings his bloody mop my way, and I run like hell was after me.
Excerpt 2: I pick up the phone, sure that someone should be alerted to this. “You won’t get answer, Vaan Strudel knows.” Vaan Strudel says to me, almost sycophantically. “Is dead. Phone is dead. Like emergency exit doors. Like man on floor. Maybe your cellular phone, enh?” Just as he predicted, the phone was dead.
Excerpt 3: Just then, a huge cacophony split the night’s muzak, as a huge clang is heard from the roof. The wind must really be picking up, the storm is howling like my grandmother’s teacup Chihuahua. Speaking of devilish beasts, there are those two eyes again, at the end of the aisle. What the hell are they?
What are your top 10 favorite books/authors?
Sure, this is always a fun one to do.
Where 1 is the highest, and 10 is the lowest (But still good!):
10. Ready Player One (Ernest Cline)
9. Of Mice & Men (John Steinbeck)
8. Mateguas Island (Linda Watkins)
7. Kill Creek (Scott Thomas)
6. Night of 1,000 Beasts (John Palisano)
5. Hellmuth (Meghan Richardson)
4. Harry Potter Series (But JK can get fucked)
3. Goosebumps (R.L. Stine)
2. Dragonlance (Weis/Hickman)
1. Hearts in Atlantis / Dark Tower (Stephen King)
What book do you think everyone should read?
Whatever the holy handgrenades of heck makes them happy. If that’s Stephanie Meyer’s Twilight, do it. I think everyone should read On Writing by Stephen King if you’re a writer. If you’re just a reader, Oh the places you’ll go by Dr. Seuss.
How long have you been writing?
I’ve been writing since about 2nd grade. I regret nothing.
Do the characters all come to you at the same time or do some of them come to you as you write?
So definitely NOT all at once. Like, Torga, for instance from Natalsa of the Brim, I didn’t know he was going to be one of my favorite all time characters. Did I know he was also going to be a bear? Nope. But nobody else knew that either, so I don’t feel bad! 😊
Do you see writing as a career?
It absolutely is, whether or not you’re getting paid is irrelevant.
What do you think about the current publishing market?
I think there’s never been a better time to be an author. We are no long bound by the stringent crap of publishing houses who for so long overlooked a heckton of good stories just because of [generic reason here].
Do you read yourself and if so what is your favorite genre?
I love the horror industry. I’ve been a proud member of the Horror Writers Association for about 5 years now. I like feeling scared, it’s a controlled fear, and lets me experience emotions in a way I don’t normally get to. It’s adrenaline, it’s primal, and it’s hotter than Satan’s BBQ pit.
Do you prefer to write in silence or with noise? Why?
When it comes to writing, I have to have music. I need to lose myself in the rhythm, the cords, and just get the heck out of real life. I’m the story when I zone in, and I adopt mentally any emotion that character is experiencing. If they’re in love, I’m in love, if they’re on their way to slaughter 15,000 peasants, well, I just hope there ain’t a village nearby. That is good writing, getting to a symbiotic relationship with your characters and letting them live through your keystrokes.
What made you want to become an author and do you feel it was the right decision?
I always enjoyed reading stories, I loved escaping into their world, and getting to see things from their eyes. I wanted more than this however, I wanted to shape those worlds from the air, I wanted to breathe my characters needs. It was the right decision and I know this because very few things outside of my children and family give me this level of enjoyment and completenesss.
Advice they would give new authors?
Write every day. It’s going to suck before it becomes success.
Chad
McClendon is a 32 year old author who studied English & Creative
Writing at Northern Kentucky University. Chad has been published most
recently through Crossed Heart, as well as in several online
publications. He has won various awards for Fiction Writing. His
short story, "Uploaded Vengeance" is now available in "One
Night In Salem" by FunDead Publications.
Chad
attended high school in Alexandria, Kentucky at Bishop Brossart High
School. He was a founding member of Monday's Child, a volunteer group
that worked around the Tri-State to better the lives of others. He
was active in French Language competitions, and a general
troublemaker otherwise.
He
and his wife, Briana, have two daughters and one boy . In his free
time Chad enjoys camping at Red River Gorge, playing video games and
also swimming. Authors who have inspired him include Stephen King,
John Steinbeck, William Golding, J.K. Rowling, Margaret Weis, Tracy
Hickman, and others.
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